puerile.
July 11, 2008 at 9:48 am Posted in megalomaniac |
A month or so ago, the blogosphere was all abuzz over this story from the New York Times magazine (see here, here, and here, for starters), revealing former Gawker editor Emily Gould to be as petty, self-absorbed/involved, and megalomaniacal as I continue to view myself, for wanting to have this, that, or any blog. I can’t quite figure out what it is that drives me. I started a Livejournal in 2003(?), which then morphed into skinscented.blogspot.com, which became sansguile.blogspot.com. I’ve barely committed to any of them, even though my mind is running fathoms per hour daily. My walks to and from work blend together in a wavering meditation of sorts. I spend a majority of my day reading The Internet, scanning blogs, watching YouTube videos, reading the news and catching up on celebrity gossip. Yet, somehow, I can’t be bothered to regurgitate any of this information, these opinions and epiphanies, the hilariously mundane sitcom shenanigans that make up my life.
I have a feeling it may have something to do the The Stranger/SLOG escapade. Granted, that was close to two years ago, and while I’m over the episode and consequences themselves, I still feel violated by the vulnerability that post, and a subsequent one by Erica C. Barnett, exposed me to. My Myspace profile was public at the time. Someone found me on The Stranger’s profile and posted a link in the comments. Suddenly I was being called a “self-entitled hipster” with “nice bangs and dyed black hair, fatty.” So here I was, with both my ethics (rightly so) and my physical appearance being called into question, yet nowhere was my writing being discussed. That was what I expected and even welcomed from the experience, but instead I got immature anonymous insults posted to a story that was really only 60% true. Do I want to do that again? Do I want to flay myself open for all the (internet) world to see? On the flipside, what point does a private blog make? I’d like to open up discussion and discourse, I welcome constructive crticism, etc, and it’s difficult to do so with hidden words.
I was talking to Bess the other day about how I hide in shame behind the Keenan Bowen name, and she scoffed. ”Work that shit to your advantage,” she said. My passion for writing about music has waned to almost obscurity, but I still like putting words to paper (so to speak). So, the rebirth of slick: noblackink.com.
Welcome!
July 15th, 2008 at 10:19 am
I’m more in to analog(non digital) bloging. Sorry.
July 15th, 2008 at 12:54 pm
Welcome back to blogland. You’ve been missed.
I meant what I said, too — you own all that work and have a good portfolio. Just remember, the popular kids are the ones who get shat on the most. “Don’t hate me ‘cuz you ain’t me,” right?
Fuck them haters. Keep on it.
July 15th, 2008 at 2:15 pm
You would do this nice shiny webpage a disservice by ignoring it.
Keenan Bowen never existed. Bailee Martin does. People who matter know you can write, so you owe it to us to keep doing it.
Don’t make me start another three bands that need bios to keep you writing. I don’t have time. Oh wait, yeah I do.
July 15th, 2008 at 11:01 pm
Earlier this evening someone said “dont hate me cuz you aint me” and i admitted that the phrase was entirely new to me.
Then i log onto this newly birthed blog and there it is again… Wacky. I wont expect to be drop-jawed every time i visit, but i am glad to have you back. Plus im sure mom likes having something to read other than lame movie reviews and cat stories.
July 16th, 2008 at 7:28 am
bookmarked.
August 5th, 2008 at 9:01 pm
“When it comes down to it, I let them think what they want. If they care enough to bother with what I do, then I’m already better than them.” -M. Monroe
August 20th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
An unfortunate consequence of blogging is the transparency. I have written things on my blog that have caused my boss to call me into his office and scold me. Mind you, i wasn’t writing about my job — just an observation about a certain club in town. I was also scolded for a letter to the editor that was critical of the school board. I’ve had my ex-wife call me and complain about something i wrote that upset her, her new husband, her mother and her mother’s co-workers. Such is life. Many people are honest enough to say what is thought or felt — to loved ones or pets or a diary. Few are brave enough to let the world read it. My mother and grandfather read my blog and that is what will temper me. No fear of the anonymous haters. Besides, i track their IP addresses and hold a terrible grudge!